The Letter

“Time going by fast is an opportunity to refocus on what is most important in life.”

- my mother

I was going through some of the things I brought from my mom’s house that I want to organize into a legacy scrapbook. There are letters between her and my dad, poems, old documents, pictures, and several other things. Reminders of a beautiful story that transformed this world into a better place. 

Among those papers I found a letter that my mom wrote to me and my siblings shortly after my dad had passed away. She was trying to decide the direction we should take as a family after such a loss, and wrote us a letter filled with love, encouragement, guidance, and wisdom. What a treasure I found! 

One of the things my mom wrote was how fast time was passing by. It had been three months since my father had died and we were going through a major life change with a possible international move ahead of us. What’s interesting is that my mother said time going by fast was a good thing. This caught me by surprise as we usually see time flying by as something negative. When time speeds through, we believe we don’t have the opportunity to do the many things we feel we have to do. 

From my mom’s perspective though, the realization that time was going by fast was an opportunity to refocus on what was most important in life.

Like many families, we were preoccupied with daily life, our jobs, school, meals, home management, vacations, and the many things that filled our days. But all seemed so unimportant after losing my father. We learned that  the plans we humans make are subject to changes and interruptions, and the things that we spend our lives running after and desire to possess, have little true value after all.

I was barely out of my teen years when my dad died. Although I learned important truths at that time, this desire to focus on what’s most important didn’t happen personally until a few years ago God took me on an adventure to the Last Frontier, Alaska. More specifically when we purchased a little home out in the woods. It was there, for the first time ever away from city life and in the quietness of the forest, that my eyes were opened to the amazing benefits of a simple life focused on what matters most.

I was sharing with friends the benefits of a simple life and how liberating it was when one of them asked me to help her simplify a room in her house. She explained that among other things, the room had boxes of stuff from when she had moved into her house 10 years ago. I told her I would be happy to help, as long as she knew that I had absolutely no attachment to her stuff. Her eyes opened up wide and with fear she began telling me what she absolutely could not depart with. In the end the room saw little change. 

I don’t blame her. We all get attached to things. A while back I almost gave my wedding dress to a friend who was getting married. The dress is timeless and beautiful, and similar to what she was looking for. It had been in a box since I had gotten married, so I offered my friend to try it out. I was delighted it could be put to good use. All was well until I saw her with the dress on. All of a sudden my attachment to it became too strong and I just couldn’t give it away. This story could’ve had a happy ending, with a bride walking down the aisle with that beautiful dress. Instead the dress went back inside the box and stored in the garage where it still lives to this day, a reminder that I still have a lot to learn. How sad. 

It’s so difficult to get rid of our stuff because we put our hearts and soul into it. We must however, change our relationship with these objects. We have held on so tight to all these things, that now we are over-worked, stressed out, and sick just trying to maintain them. We have become slaves of our stuff. Its time to free ourselves! 

The reality is that these plastic, wooden, or metal objects we love so much, don’t love us back. The clothes we so much like, could care less about us. The things we are so strongly attached to have no feelings toward us. My love for my wedding dress is not reciprocated. 

What society tells will bring us happiness is wrong. All the stuff we’ve been buying and bringing into our lives is causing more stress than happiness. It may bring temporary fun, but not happiness.

Its time to move forward! Time to let go of what’s enslaving us, the things that keep us down and distracted. Time to run for freedom, pursue peace, and start living an abundant life. Time to invest in you and in the people who are part of you.

As my mom counseled me and my siblings in that letter written so many years ago, the way to achieve this abundant life is by focusing on the bright and beautiful future God has for us. With that as our focus, we will begin to see the things of this world for what they truly are. As having no value, temporary, and of no relevant importance. Then slowly our eyes will be opened to what has true worth.